A Very Genovian Summer

May 23rd, 2009

I know, it’s been ages since I last posted.

But as you can imagine, a LOT has been going on: Final exams. Saying goodbye to all my friends here at school and moving out of the dorms for summer break. The thing coming out in the press about Grandmere and Mel Gibson (you’d think I’d stop being shocked by her love affairs by now.  But she still never ceases to surprise me).  

But all that’s behind me now, and it’s SUMMER!   And I’m out of school, and finally home!

Well, not in the loft.   I was there for a little while. But then because of the thing with Grandmere, Dad was like, "You need to come help me do some reputation repair."              

So I only got to hang at the loft with Mom and Rocky and Mr. G for a couple of days before I had to jet off to Genovia, where I’m probably going to be stuck for the rest of the summer.

I’d say it wasn’t fair, but I know better than that by now.  It’s all part of the princess thing.   It comes with the tiara.  

I mean, yeah, so okay, Lilly gets to spend the summer in the city doing a fantastic internship with the New York Times.  

And Tina gets to do one in the Village with St. Vincent’s Hospital.

And Boris is going to be playing in the orchestra that accompanies Shakespeare in the Park (which isn’t that great if you ask me because it’s going to be hot and I’ve seen how he sweats when he plays.   I asked Tina if he has to wear a tux and she says for at least one of the plays he has to a wear a troubadour costume.   Ha!   I might just fly back for that one.   Boris in tights?   Yes, please.   I might never die laughing.   Or throw up.   I’m not sure which).

Lana, of course, was too busy partying this past semester to look for an internship, so she has to spend the summer working in her dad’s office (she’s lucky she didn’t get stuck in summer school, repeating her course work), since that was the only thing she could get.

She said not to worry, though, she’s got a friend from Penn whose parents are going to be in Europe for the summer, so they can use his house in the Hamptons to party every weekend.

Oh, Lana! It’s good to know some people never really change, I guess (she says she has three more years to “get serious”).  

Shameeka is the one everyone is jealous of, though.   She got an actual paying job.   AT THE WHITE HOUSE.

Yes, we all hate her now (ha, not really.   I mean, really she got a job but the White House, but no, we don’t really hate her).

I’m the only one who will be stuck working for her dad (oh, wait"¦well, besides Lana), supervising the opening of the new Royal Genovian Health and Wellness Awareness Center (formerly the Prince Christoffe Casino and Hotel).

But in a fiscal crisis (the current global economic recession has hit Genovia hard.   Practically no one can afford to come to a mile-long Mediterranean resort paradise to gamble, relax, sail their yacht, and shop anymore), Dad says you have to think outside the box.   We can’t just depend on tourist income from cruise ship day trippers (not to mention the fact that the cruise ships are polluting our waters and killing our reefs).              

But the one thing everyone needs, recession or not, is healthcare.  

That’s how I got the idea for the Health and Wellness Center!   Why not make Genovia, in addition to being a vacation destination, a place where you can have all your healthcare needs met as well?  

Need a complete routine physical along with an MRI and CAT scan to check for cancerous tumors? Check into our luxurious and beautiful wellness center (and spa), get all of that done in one day, enjoy a romantic sunset over the Mediterranean, have a cocktail and dinner, play some baccarat, maybe do some shopping in the morning after brunch, play some golf, get your results and your prescriptions, and you’re done!  

Bingo.   Genovia is suddenly the healthcare destination of Europe, for anyone who is worried about that mole or lump but doesn’t want to wait around in an icky doctor’s office, and wants to throw in a vacation, too.

I always knew my chronic hypochondria was going to pay off someday.    I got a genius business idea because of it!

The entire Saudi Arabian royal family has already checked in.   The princesses are running around, getting their mammograms, while the princes are having their colonoscopies. I’ve laid out a few complimentary copies of "Ransom My Heart."   Just enough for the ladies to start fighting over.   If they want more, they’ll be able to find them in the gift shop.   Hey, I want to make sure Greenpeace gets its cut!

Of course, to make up for Mel Gibsongate, we’ve invited 50 low income families for medical screening, treatment, and pampering, as well.   Grandmere is fit to be tied about it.   She keeps asking, "Who let those people in here?"   Dad has to remind her that there are seven little Gibsons whose parents are getting a divorce because of her, and that even the Pope can’t believe what she did.

But Grandmere is just all, "I’m not the one who told him to make Lethal Weapon 4." She refuses to take any responsibility whatsoever for her actions, as usual.   She won’t even admit to having broken Mel’s heart, and being the reason why he’s taken up with that other woman.  

It’s all just so typically Grandmere.

But in the end—and not to be selfish, or anything—it’s all worked out great for me. Pavlov   Medical is partnering with the Royal Genovian Health and Wellness Awareness Center, and is the firm supplying all the medical equipment.  

So I get to see my boyfriend all break!

I really think it’s going to be the best summer ever.      

Oops, I have to go.   The royal Saudi princesses are calling me to join them for pedicures.   They want to know if there’s a sequel to "Ransom My Heart."   I might make one up just for them. They’re going to need it.   They have no idea how grumpy their husbands are going to be when they get out of those colonoscopies.    Dad got one the other day so he could assure the princes it was nothing to worry about….

Oh my God, I couldn’t believe how cranky he was.  

Of course, I shouldn’t have let him order those chicken wings from the palace menu when he woke up.  I don’t know what I was thinking!  But that’s what he said he wanted.  Never again.  In fact, I’m thinking about having them taken off the menu.

Bye for now!

Love,

 

Mia

March 18th, 2009

I know!   I haven’t updated in forever.  

 

But school is hard.                

 

And so is being a princess.  

 

Not to mention being a romance author.

 

Try combining all three!

 

Although being a romance author is actually a lot easier during a world wide global economic crisis than you might think.   Because who doesn’t want to escape into a fun romance novel in order to escape their troubles?

 

So good news!   Ransom My Heart will be coming out soon(ish"¦think this summer) in France!   Here’s the cover:

 

 


 

I’ll admit it isn’t very Fabioesque.   But it gets the point across.   In translation, it says, roughly:

 

A novel by a Princess:   Now let’s move on to super serious things

 

Okay, I don’t really get how that translates to Ransom My Heart either.  

 

And I’ve been told the publisher is removing some of the, um, steamier passages so they can keep the book in the children’s section (???).  

 

But, hey"¦whatever I have to do to keep the money flowing to Greenpeace.   Right?   I mean, look at this face:

 

I’m going to deny this face because the French want to remove a few nipple references?   Mais non!

 

It will still be the same book, just slightly abridged.

 

Anyway, it’s spring break, and guess where I am?   If you guessed Genovia, you’d be correct!

 

It’s super sunny and nice here. You should totally book a visit if you haven’t made your spring break plans yet.

 

 

Sadly, I’m not alone.   Or rather, not as alone as I’d like to be—I’m with my significant other.   THAT part is fine.  

 

It’s just that every single person I know, it seems like, has invited him or herself here for break along with us!  

 

Fortunately it’s too hot for certain of   them to wear sweaters and tuck them in to his pants. If that happened, my romantic spring break would be ruined FOR SURE.

 


 

Oh well.   Next time, I’ll know better than to tell anyone (other than my boyfriend) where I’m going!

 

Hope you’re having a great spring break!  Talk to you soon!

 

 

Love,

 

Mia

 

I Luv Romance

February 5th, 2009

So many wonderful things have been going on since I last posted! Well, not school-related things, of course–although I do love school. Have you ever heard the expression, if you hate high school, you’ll love college? IT’S SO TRUE!

Anyway, being back in school after break is going fine, especially since this semester I didn’t listen to my advisor, and now I don’t have a single class that starts before eleven. SCORE!!!!

So things are going much better than they were last semester when I had one seminar that started at 8AM. What was I thinking? Never take a class that starts before eleven (if you can avoid it). That’s my motto for college.

Another tip? A good breakfast to get you through the day equals chocolate croissant + large chai = yum!

But, what I mean by things going well is, I finally got to see some of those interviews I did—you know, the ones I was talking about in this blog a few months ago?

It’s weird being an author because you do a lot of publicity stuff for your book way before it ever comes out and then you don’t see the results until way after the book arrives on store shelves"¦.

And, well, anyway, here’s a link to the interview I did in Romantic Times Magazine. I think it turned out pretty well!

And then I got asked to write a little post for a website called Dear Author about what it was like the day I found out I was going to get published. Here’s a link to that as well. I think it turned out pretty well, too.

So, I’ve been getting a little bit of fan mail! The Royal Genovian Press office handles the fan mail I receive in my capacity as a member of the Royal House of Renaldo. Mail I receive as an author is another matter entirely.

So I thought I’d try to tackle some of it here in my blog:

Hi Mia,

Just finished your lastest book Ransom My Heart and I absolutly loved it!!!! AND I love that you donated the proceeds to Greenpeace. I was just wondering whether there is a sequel in the making….
Rene

Hi, Rene! Thank you so much for writing! I’m glad you support Greenpeace, as well.

As for a sequel to Ransom My Heart, I just don’t know. I definitely plan to write more books, and maybe even another medieval romance, but not with those same characters (but possibly their offspring).

Right now though I’m pretty busy. Writing is really important to me but so is not flunking out of college.

Hi Royal Highness! Your book was great. I had stopped reading romance novels other than those by Betty Neels and Georgette Heyer, but I will buy any future ones you write. Ransom was well written and entertaining.

Thanks for the terrific book!
Sheila

Thank you so much, Sheila! I love books by Georgette Heyer, too– she’s one of my all time favorites, in fact!

I’ve never tried any books by Betty Neels (my friend Tina, who is my romance novel coach, must have missed her) but based on your recommendation, I definitely will! I love discovering new authors.

Princess Mia, I loved Ransom My Heart! I think it might be my all time favorite romance! Which makes me wonder"¦what’s YOUR all time favorite romance?

Heather

What an appropriate question, Heather, considering it’s Valentine’s Day this month!

The only problem is, it’s really hard question to answer, considering I have so many favorites.

I think this one might be my all time favorite:

The illustrations are so weirdly beautiful"¦but the writing is beautiful too.

On the other hand, of course I’ve also always love this one:

And this one:

And this one:

And this one:

"¦not to mention all the other ones I can’t remember at the moment.

Oh, I guess could never choose just one! I have lots of favorites!

Hi! I just wanted to know if there is a different title to Ransom My Heart in the UK?

Thank you! Zaynah

Hi, Zaynah! The good news is, Ransom My Heart will have the same title in the UK as it does in the US.

Now for the bad news: I just heard that Ransom My Heart won’t be out in the UK until December 2009!

I’m so sorry for the delay, but they are making it a Christmas release.

But with the above list of titles I’ve just mentioned, you should have plenty to read to keep you occupied until then! Or at least until the end of this month.

And in the meantime, if you’re feeling sad, you can always Cornify this page by clicking this button:
Cornify

I have to go now. I have to figure out what I’m going to get a certain someone for Valentine’s Day (even if he doesn’t necessarily believe in it).

Love,

Mia

Liveblogging the Inaugural Ball

January 20th, 2009

Hi! I’m writing this from the Inaugural Balls! Yes, the Genovian Royal Palace received invitations to the Inauguration, so I’m here at the Neighborhood Ball. I got to see this happen live:


Taken with my iPhone

It was so sweet. I loved the way Beyonce’s face crumpled up after she was done singing her song for the President and First Lady’s first dance. She just busted out crying!

I was wondering how she kept herself from breaking down the whole time (if you missed it click here). She is such a consummate professional!

I myself was bawling my eyes out. I had to excuse myself to go into the ladies room to fix my eye makeup. While I was in there, Shakira asked if she could borrow my lipgloss!!!!

I said yes of course because, well"¦she’s Shakira!!!! And she said she really liked my Missoni gown (which kind of surprised me because Grandmére picked it out and I kinda hated it but maybe not anymore…)

Anyway, Tina already texted me like five times wanting to know if I could hear what the Obamas were whispering to each other about when they were dancing (because I was so close to the stage).

And the truth is, I could! Grandmére totally drilled me in the art of lipreading. It is an essential skill for any princess who wants to avoid a coup (or score a Birkin bag).

Here’s what the First Lady and President were saying while they were dancing:

The First Lady to the President: Don’t you dare try to dip me.

The President to the First Lady: Come on. Just once.

The First Lady: No. I mean it, Barack. No way.

The President: Come on. It will be cool. I won’t drop you. I swear.

The First Lady: There is no freaking way you are dipping me on national television in this dress in front of Sting and Beyonce.

The President: You’re no fun.

The First Lady: Well"¦you can dip me when we get home later if you want.

The President: Awesome!


Taken with my iPhone

They’re so cute together! Just like me and my boyfriend. Who, by the way, won’t stop dipping me while we dance.

But it’s okay because the cameras are all pointed at the President and First Lady, so it’s not like anyone is going to notice us.

Which is good, since the truth is, I secretly kind of like being dipped.

Oops, I have to go now, they’re playing our song!

Love,

Mia

My Book is in Stores Now!

January 7th, 2009

"¦and I’m still stuck in Genovia on Winter Break.

And guess what they don’t have in Genovia?

My book.

I’m serious. I’m not trying to start an international incident or anything, but SOMEONE has put the kibosh on sales of Ransom My Heart over here.

And I totally know why, too.

And it’s NOT FAIR.

It’s like I told Grandmére, Ransom My Heart is a very humorous and moving romance about a young girl’s sexual awakening in the year 1291. What’s not to love? I mean, this reader liked the book, enough to blog about it, and I don’t even know her!

And my friend Tina Hakim Baba told me People Magazine gave it 4 stars!
She even sent a picture of the review that she took with her very own iPhone!

SO WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY OWN FAMILY????

Why can’t they just accept me for what I am–a romance writing princess, who also happened to restore democracy to her principality, while keeping her royal title, much like Prince Albert of Monaco, only not bald?

I think Grandmére is just embarrassed by some of the steamier passages in the book. Like the one on page 129 that goes:

Suddenly, he was kissing her even more urgently, his hands traveling down her sides, past her hips, until they cupped those leather-clad buttocks and lifted her full up against him.

Her firm breasts crushed against his chest, her thighs clenched tightly around his hips, Hugo molded Finnula against him, kissing her cheeks, her eyelids, her throat. The sensuous reaction he’d evoked from her amazed and excited him, and when she held his face between both her hands and rained kisses upon him, he groaned, both from the sweetness of the gesture and the fact that he could feel the heat from between her legs burning against his own urgent need.

Holding her to him with one arm, he swept open the collar of her shirt and placed a hand over her heart, feeling the silken heaviness of her breast. Finnula let out another sound, this one a sigh of such longing that Hugo could not stifle a wordless cry of eagerness, and he looked about for a pile of hay thick enough for them to lay in….

….and turned to see the witless Evan standing in the open barn doorway, his jaw slack, his ears as red as fire as he stared at them.

I mean, I get that Grandmére is embarrassed because I wrote about an incredibly handsome, dry-witted earl touching the boobs of the equally strong-willed hot-blooded minx who has kidnapped him and all. But Grandmére just needs to relax. It’s not like she’s never been there.

Anyway, it’s becoming very clear to me now that I need to get back to the US, and pronto. Not only because of the totally unfair embargo of Ransom My Heart here in Genovia (and don’t think I don’t know you’re behind it, Grandmére! Also that you read this blog, which is why it looks this way instead of being cool with hot pink skulls on it), but because there’s all this promotional stuff going on for my book! And I’m missing out!

Oh, and also because of Dad.

And I’m not even going to get into all that. Honestly, how much more can a girl be expected to take?

Oh, and did I mention"¦.

THANKS SO FOR BUYING MY BOOK—I’m more grateful than you’ll ever know (ALL the author proceeds go to Greenpeace. And the paper it’s printed on is 100% recycled—no joke).

You’ve made all this princess’s dreams come true.

Also, HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Love,

Mia

Home!

December 23rd, 2008

I am so glad to be home! It’s Winter Break, finally. No more exams, no more school food (not that it’s bad"¦I kind of like the bean burritos), no more papers to write"¦I can give Fat Louie a big hug and RELAX!

Only not for long, because right after the holidays, I start doing publicity interviews and stuff for my new book!

I can hardly believe I’m saying (or writing) those words. MY NEW BOOK. I have my OWN BOOK!!!! Somebody pinch me!

(Only don’t because last time I said that, Grandmere did pinch me and I had a black and blue mark on my arm for days and I had to cover it up with Erase so it wouldn’t look like I was an abuse victim, which I am, actually, thanks to her.)

So, the good news is, I got an amazing review for Ransom My Heart, this one from BOOKPAGE.

The bad news is, they mistook me for a fictional character.

But that’s OK, it’s still a good review! As Tina Hakim Baba (always the optimist) would say, what matters is, your name is on it somewhere!

One Sweet Knight

Meg Cabot offers a frolicking medieval romance, Ransom My Heart (Avon A, $14.99, 432 pages, ISBN 9780061700071), in the guise of her fictional character Princess Mia Thermopolis of Genovia (of Princess Diaries fame): Irrepressible Finnula Crais, young expert huntress with a shadowed past, succumbs to a sister’s pleading to find a man. A man, that is, that Finnula can kidnap and ransom in order to restore her older sister’s spent dowry. Tough on the outside, but soft on the inside, Finnula agrees, and through a delightful series of events captures a handsome knight on his way home from the Holy Land. Hugo has a secret, but it doesn’t stop him from falling in with the adventurous Finnula’s plan, or falling in love. When the pair’s secrets and shadows are revealed, complications abound, and attempts on Hugo’s life threat- en Finnula as well as the happy ending they seek. Peopled with entertaining characters, Cabot’s latest romps briskly to a satisfying denouement.

Nice, huh?

And check this out: My first cover for a foreign edition! This is for the UK version (which won’t be out until July. I know, I’m really bummed about it not being out for so long, too):

Pretty, right? Only, my name isn’t very big on it. But that’s OK, too, I guess. Hey, at least it’s on there and spelled correctly (as Tina would say)!

All right, I have to go pack now because I’m actually supposed to catch the royal jet to Genovia tonight. I don’t really want to go, but to tell you the truth the weather there is a LOT better than the weather here in New York City right now…so much as I’ll be sad to miss out on Christmas morning with Mom and Mr. G and Rocky (who has about nine million presents under the Dead Celebrity Tree), it’s 72 degrees and sunny in Genovia.

Yeah. So"¦ciao, Manhattan!

And happy holidays, everyone!

Love,

Mia

More Reviews

December 2nd, 2008

I can’t believe it’s been over a month since I updated this blog. That’s inexcusable, even if I have been really busy with school and royal duties and the holidays and publicity and my social life and stuff.

Anyway, I’m pretty excited because today my editor let me know that Ransom My Heart got a really good review from something called Booklist. Here it is, in case you want to read it:

BOOKLIST ADVANCED REVIEWS – 12.15.08

*Ransom My Heart.
Thermopolis, Mia (Author) and Cabot, Meg (Author)
Jan 2009. 432 p. Avon, paperback, $13.95. (9780061700071).

Her Royal Highness Amelia Mignonette Grimaldi Thermopolis Renaldi, Crown Princess of Genovia, has decided to write her own book. "Mia" is used to fame, after all, since her creator turned coauthor, Meg Cabot, has shared her story in the bestselling Princess Diaries series. Now Mia tells the tale of Finnula Crais, a thirteenth-century lass whose skills as an archer far surpass those of anyone else in her village. She often shoots forbidden game in the forest belonging to Sir Hugo Fitzstephen, Earl of Stephensgate, sharing the meat with the struggling peasantry. When another of Finnula’s many sisters is about to get married and the family can’t afford a dowry, the incorrigible Finnula decides to kidnap Sir Hugo, who has returned from the Crusades with what she figures must be a bounty of spoils. Then the worst thing possible happens: Finnula falls in love with the captive knight. The antics and adventures of the feisty heroine and frustrated hero make this hilarious medieval romance a sure-to-please page-turner. And the authors are true to their animal-rights and environmental convictions: all proceeds from the novel, which is printed on environmentally friendly paper, will be donated to Greenpeace.— Shelley Mosley

I know! This is a big deal. It’s making it all seem kind of real, you know?

And not to toot my own horn, or anything, but other nice reviews have been coming in as well, like this one

"¦which means a lot to me, because it’s written by an actual college student–just like me! (Although the author doesn’t seem very familiar with current romantic fiction if she thinks a lot of them feature stereotypical characters or blushing maidens. Hardly any of them do anymore. They’re usually full of well-crafted characters and heroines who don’t act at all maidenly.)

Of course, not all the feedback I’ve received about the book has been positive. It seems my grandmother isn’t the only one who is unhappy about my having written Ransom My Heart and gotten it published (even though by doing so I’ve accomplished a lifelong dream. Thanks for the support, Grandmére!)

Apparently one or two people dislike it because the characters in the book have sex (I know, shocking: It’s a romance). And the reason for their unhappiness with this is because the movies of my life (you remember those, right?) are geared toward children.

So, allegedly, children might pick up Ransom My Heart, which is by me, and LEARN ABOUT SEX! Apparently, I’m not ever supposed to mention sex or write books in which characters have sex, even if they are adult characters who live in medieval times WHO WERE NOT IN THE MOVIES OF MY LIFE, and the book is being sold in the ADULT SECTION OF THE BOOKSTORE.

I would just like to point out that people who worry about these things remind me SO MUCH of my grandmother (not the grandmother from the movies of my life, who was cool, but my real life grandmother, who is so not cool).

Also that people who worry about kids being psychologically scarred from reading love scenes in romance novels really need to get a grip on reality. I recommend they visit this site or this one and find out about some of our world’s real problems.

Anyway, sorry if you’ve been waiting for me to friend you on MySpace or whatever, I’ve been pretty busy, and now things are about to get even crazier with finals, doing press for the book, and the holidays and all of that. I’ll try to keep this blog and my MySpace updated though. Maybe I’ll even join Facebook!

Okay, that might be TOO much. Even for me!

In the meantime, if you want a widget that counts down the days until the book comes out, you can get one here:

Cool, right????

Okay, I gotta go now or I’m going to miss dinner in the dining hall. Everyone’s waiting for me.

Talk to you later!

Love,
Mia

First review…also Fabio!

October 27th, 2008

I’m really excited! I got my first review!   It’s from a magazine called Publishers Weekly, and it’s really good, if I do say so myself.   I mean, not to brag or anything.   Well, you can judge for yourself:

 

Ransom My Heart  Meg Cabot Avon, $13.95 paper (432p) ISBN 978-0-06-170007-1, on sale date January 6, 2009

The gimmick to accompany the conclusion of the Princess Diaries is this delightful historical romance written by series heroine Princess Mia Thermopolis ("with help from" Cabot, who is donating all proceeds to Greenpeace). Finn Crais is the resourceful daughter of a miller living in Stephensgate, England, in 1291. When Finn’s older sister, Mellana, gets pregnant by a troubadour and has no money for a dowry, Finn agrees to carry out Mellana’s ridiculous plan to abduct a wealthy man and hold him ransom, settling on Earl Hugh Fitzstephen, fresh back from the crusades and loaded with gold and jewels. Finn doesn’t realize who it is she’s captured, and Fitzstephen, owing to a curiosity about Finn and wanting to see where the kidnapping will lead, plays along. As to be expected, passions become enflamed, and Finn discovers her sister’s plan may not be a simple as she originally thought. Though predictable, the novel is thoroughly enjoyable and funny. Cabot’s fans, and particularly those graduating from the Princess Diaries, will be pleased, especially as they may have read brief excerpts in Forever Princess, the series finale (Reviews, p. 55). (Jan.)

And okay, I realize the review says the book is predictable, but predictable is not really the worst thing for a romance novel.   I mean, you do kind of know the hero and heroine are going to get together at some point.   I mean, duh.   The thing you’re waiting to find out is when, and how, and in what position and after how much arguing.  

So I think that’s okay.

The important thing is, Publishers Weekly  said it was DELIGHTFUL!  And thoroughly enjoyable!   And funny!  

And they got the plot and all the characters and my name right!   YAY!!!!

OK, they did mess up the part about Meg Cabot (who only wrote the foreword for the book).   They kind of implied she wrote the whole thing and some other crazy stuff (she is the royal chronicler of my diaries.   Sometimes people get mixed up about that).  

But what does it really matter, when the rest of it says my book was delightful, thoroughly enjoyable, and funny? Right?   Yay!

Anyway, last week I also had my first interview about my book!   It was really weird, because I’m used to being interviewed (of course), but not about writing.   I actually don’t have a lot of time for all this book publicity stuff, with my royal duties and college course load and (extremely limited) social life.  

And they kept asking me about my NEXT book! Like I have so much time to just sit down and write another one!   Or at least, not until summer break.

Anyway, my interview was with a magazine called Romantic Times Book Reviews.    You’ll be able to read it in the January issue (if they don’t cut it–this happens all the time, as I know from working on The Atom back in high school).  I’m very excited about being in this magazine though because I heard it used to frequently feature Fabio back in the old days.      My friend Tina Hakim Baba says he was one of the great romance novel cover models, until he graduated to I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter commercials.  

Here’s a picture of Fabio, on a book cover—if you look close you will notice he has NO CLOTHES ON!!!    Like, zero.    Also, is it just me, or does he look a little ripe?      If I were that girl, I’d totally make him take a shower before I had sex with him.

 

Here are some other pictures of Fabio on some other romance novel covers:

He was on like a zillion covers for my publisher before he moved on to do TV commercials.  Then he got hit in the head by a bird when he was riding on a roller coaster at Six Flags Great Adventure (or somewhere).    This must have scarred him, if not physically then obviously emotionally, as it would anyone.  

Here is Fabio after he was hit by the bird.

I don’t know why that one girl next to him is laughing.  Animal-related injuries are never amusing. Maybe she is just asking if he needs a tissue.

Fabio’s okay now though.  According to Wikipedia, you can see him sometimes on America’s Next Top Model and on Conan O’Brien.   In the dorm, we often stay up late enough to watch Conan, allegedly while doing homework, and order in pizza.   But I have yet to see Fabio on the show.   I’m totally going to look out for him now though!   It’s my duty as a romance writer.

Well, that’s it for now.   I have to go celebrate study for my art history mid-term (I always forget my dad is reading this).  Bye!

Love,

Mia  

A New Blog…and Book

September 26th, 2008

Um"¦yeah. So I have a blog now. I’m not sure how this happened. Except well"¦as you can see, I’ve written a book.

Don’t tell anyone!

Well, I mean, you can tell people I’ve written a book. In fact, tell a LOT of people, because all of the author proceeds go to Greenpeace"¦for real! Every person who buys my book will be helping to save a whale or preserve a polar ice cap (the book is printed on totally recycled paper)!

Which of course has always been my dream. To save the whales, I mean. And become a published writer. I’m getting two dreams come true at once!

What I meant was, don’t tell anyone about this blog because, well, this website didn’t turn out anything like I wanted it to. I actually wanted it to have these funny unicorns on it (sorry—inside joke).

But then Grandmére found out about it. And she took over. And, well"¦you can see the result for yourself.

I guess it could be worse. It could be pink or something.

So, anyway. Yeah, I wrote a book (you can read about it over on there, on the side). It’s a real book, that will be in stores in January 2009 (December 2009 in the UK). I wrote all about my struggles trying to get it published (and how embarrassed I was when I finally confessed to people I’d written it and SOME of them thought my book was, ahem, about certain people we all know) in the tenth volume of my diaries (but thank God you’ll never get to read that!).

So. That’s about it. I’ll be back periodically to update this. Be sure to visit my Myspace and I promise to friend you (unless you’re a creepy foot fetishist like Lilly’s stalker Norman of course).

And don’t forget—buy my book, help save a whale!

Love,
Mia